Mourning the loss of another friend… another brother. JR Rocha.

KJ0N8773-5I woke up after about an hour and a half of sleep hoping the previous day was all a bad dream.  Realizing it wasn’t was the saddest feeling of all.

As I sit here listening to Megan Fox announce the second performance of U2 in Saturday Night Live, I can’t help but have the question “what if?” plague my mind.  What if? … What if he took a few more minutes break?  What if I went in there and play for him?  What if we didn’t play that last game?  What if we kept on doing what we were doing to him?  Would he still be here?

In the last few months I have lost a few of my closest friends.  And it’s sad to think that as time passes by this will keep on going.  But why now?  JR is not just some random acquaintance.  He was one of my best friends; he was more like a brother to me and to the rest of the High End crew.  My life will never be the same.

As I slowly lay back down, laying here staring at the ceiling for the last few hours, all I can think of are all the good times that we’ve had. While tears still cascading down my cheeks I chuckle a little remembering all the good times that we all shared.   From SEMA to Long Beach, from his home to our home at High End.  I’m going to miss them all.  I miss them now.

It’s really hard to bear watching one of your closest friends sit there gasping for air you cannot give and there is absolutely nothing you can do to help him.  All you can do is pray for the best and be there for him in his final minutes.  You watch and wait for him expecting him to stand up shrug it off and get back in the game because that’s what he does…  Nothing.  He’s laying on the gurney dragged away to an ambulance still hoping for him to regain consciousness…  Silence.   We arrived in the hospital anticipating the words “he’s going to be just fine,”  Instead what we got is a shake of the head and then you realized what just happened.  Took me a while to wrap my mind around the concept and question the realization as I turn around and signal the rest of the guys… We lost JR.  Some sat, some turned around and walked away, some stood there doing the same thing I was.  Stand there speechless without knowing what to do, what to say, how to react.  Tears rolled down my cheeks as if it had it’s own thoughts reacting to the news while my body stood there numb in silence telling my self this only happens on TV and movies.  Then reality sets in and all I can do is cry.  Stand there and stare at the night sky and cry.

Even now.  I thought I was done with the tears, I thought I was strong enough that I can shake it off and mourn in silence, and I cannot.  As I lie here typing these words, all I can think of is JR.  Mr Avelino Rocha III.  Thank you for all the memories for I will keep them and cherish them forever.  All the encouragement and appreciation you have given me trough the very short years that we have spent together as family.  You have always been there and always give me props on everything I do.  You always make me laugh and every time I go to the shop I look for you since it’s always a kick ass time when you are around.  All the early morning text messages that wakes me up and later on give you a hard time about and sorry for the late messages I receive and you throwing it back at me telling me I hurt your feelings because I didn’t reply.  I hope that even for the few years that we hung out together I affected your life in a positive way because you did to me in more ways than none.  I’m going to miss you man.  I’m going to miss everything about you. Your backwards hat, you’re sense of humor, your enthusiasm on everything we do as if you’re seeing it for the first time, your incredibly straight hair, your freaky resemblance to Mr Chow Yeung Fat, the way you run up and down the court to drive the ball as if telling people to move or be hurt, your laughter, Mr. Avelino Rocha III, JR… My friend, My brother until the end of time.

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Categories: The Life

7 Comments

  • Luis Sabina says:

    I hope i am misunderstanding this blog, i am new to this whole computer communication era, JR he has past, i cant believe it, i had the pleasure of meeting him and he was an awesome guy, very polite and eager to help me with my build. I wish i would have got to know him better he seemed like a great person, my heart goes out to his family and all you guys at High end

  • Brian says:

    It is terrible what happened to “Roach” as we used to call him on our Oxnard High Basketball Team.

    Would you be able to disclose his funeral services location, date and time?

    Thank you

  • Michelle Mitchell-Carrillo says:

    I had the honor of meeting Avelino at work.He was the best boss I ever had. I later became his friend and had some good times with he and his sweet wife Catherine.He always made you feel welcomed I remember he would say come by anytime.He was a caring ,kind,generous,modest and loving father and husband.He was inspiring and motivating.I miss him making me laugh and his infectious smile.He wad just a cool down to earth guy.He will be missed and thought of forever.To the Rocha family you are in my prayers. I can’t bear to imagine what you all are going through.If Catherine or her children need anything I’m here.

  • Peter says:

    So sorry to hear about the death of your friend JR Rocha. You must carry on in memory of him. It sounds like he would have wanted it that way.
    Our prayers go out to you, him and his family.

  • RP Serros says:

    I attempted to leave this following message on Avelino’s guestbook on Ventura County Star’s website, however, they failed to publish it for whatever reason.

    December 21, 2009
    I was made aware of the passing of Avelino today and I want to send my deepest condolences to his wife and children, parents, sister and other loved ones. I had the pleasure of meeting Avelino 20+ years ago at Fremont Intermediate. We became fast friends as we lived in adjacent neighborhoods and shared common interests. His amiable personality, humor, athletic prowess and maturity set him apart from his peers. I have many memories of him but perhaps the most lasting one is of 14 year-old Avelino “borrowing” his father’s Benz and cruising with him throughout the Sea Air and Via Marina neighborhoods – I couldn’t believe his courage and skills! As I read his obituary and guest book, it is no surprise that Avelino became a great man with many friends, a wonderful family and career; even back then I sensed Avelino was special. It has been well over a decade since I have seen or spoke with Avelino, however, I have thought of him often as he was one of the people that impacted my life in those formidable jr. high years. May his memory live on and may he rest in peace!

    With Respect,

    R.P. Serros

  • Nj Vicente says:

    how did he die?? awsome G37 man… Condolences..

  • Catherine rocha says:

    I miss you daddy

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